Scissoring Sex Position: A Complete Technique & Comfort Guide

The scissoring position offers intimate, full-body contact for partners seeking mutual pleasure without penetration. Despite its portrayal in media, this technique requires communication, patience, and the right approach to work well.

This guide breaks down the mechanics, variations, and practical tips that make scissoring comfortable and satisfying for both participants.

Is scissoring the same thing as tribbing or tribadism?

They’re closely related, but not always identical:

• Tribadism / tribbing is a broad term for vulva-to-vulva rubbing (or rubbing a vulva against another body part) for pleasure.
• Scissoring is one specific position where partners interlock their legs like scissors so their genitals can rub together.

So all scissoring is a form of tribbing, but tribbing can also include other positions — grinding on a thigh, lying on top of each other, or rubbing against a partner’s stomach or hip.

Can you get STIs from scissoring?

Yes, some STIs can be transmitted during scissoring, because there’s still:

• Skin-to-skin contact between genitals
• Possible contact with vaginal fluids or micro-tears in the skin

Infections that can be passed this way include things like herpes (HSV), HPV, and pubic lice, and less commonly some others if fluids are exchanged.

Risk reduction tips:

• Use dental dams or cut-open condoms as a barrier between genitals.
• Avoid scissoring during active outbreaks, sores, or unexplained irritation.
• Get regular STI testing and share results with partners.

Barriers lower risk but don’t make it zero, so communication + testing still matter.

Can you get pregnant from scissoring?

Directly from vulva-to-vulva scissoring without sperm involved? No.

Pregnancy requires sperm reaching the vagina or cervix. Scissoring between two people with vulvas and no semen present cannot cause pregnancy.

However, in mixed-body or group situations, there’s a tiny risk if:

• Semen or pre-cum from a recent ejaculation gets on fingers, toys, or other body parts and is then transferred directly to the vaginal opening.

It’s rare, but to be extra cautious:

• Wash hands/toys between activities that involve semen.
• Use condoms on toys when switching between partners or body areas.

Can people with a penis scissor too?

Yes. Scissoring is more about leg interlocking and external contact than about specific genitals, so you can adapt it for different anatomies:

• Penis owner + vulva owner:

• • You can use a “sideways 69” style where legs interlock and the penis rubs against the vulva, clitoris, or perineum, with or without penetration.

• Penis owner + penis owner:

• • Both partners lie on their sides, angle hips so shafts press together, and use lube for glide.

• Penis owner + anal focus:

• • One partner on their side, the other interlocks legs and aims the penis or toy toward the anus in a scissor-like alignment.

The core idea is crossed legs + aligned genitals, adapted to whatever anatomy you’re working with.

Can you combine scissoring with 69-style oral sex?

Yes, you can blend scissoring mechanics with 69 concepts if both of you are flexible and comfortable:

• One partner lies more on their back, the other more on their side, creating a partial X with their legs.
• Angle bodies so genitals are close enough for rubbing, but mouths can still reach each other’s vulva or penis.
• Take turns focusing on oral vs. grinding; doing both intensely at once can be physically tricky.

For most people, it’s easier to:

1. Start in a regular scissoring position to find the best genital contact.
2. Then see if small angle shifts allow one person’s mouth to reach the other, rather than forcing a perfect “porn-style” 69.

How do we make scissoring work if we’re not very flexible?

If flexibility is a challenge, focus on support and partial versions of the position:

• Use pillows or wedges under hips and backs to reduce how far legs need to open.
• Try the modified missionary scissor from your article: one person mostly on their back, the other at a 45° angle instead of fully perpendicular.
• Keep one leg straight and only one leg hooked or draped, instead of both partners fully spread.
• Shorten sessions: do 3–5 minutes of scissoring mixed into your usual positions instead of staying there the whole time.
• Stretch gently outside of sex (hips, inner thighs, lower back) if you want more range over time.

Who This Position Works For & When to Try It

Scissoring appeals to various couples and situations beyond common stereotypes:

• Partners exploring non-penetrative intimacy who want direct genital contact
• Couples with mobility limitations seeking positions with less strain on joints
• Individuals recovering from injuries who need side-lying, low-impact options
• Partners with size differences finding face-to-face positions challenging
• People seeking eye contact and connection during intimate moments
• Anyone wanting to try something different from routine positions

This position works best when both partners have similar flexibility levels and can communicate openly about adjustments.

Understanding the Mechanics: How Scissoring Actually Works

Basic Anatomy & Positioning

The scissor position gets its name from how partners' legs interlock, resembling open scissor blades. Here's the fundamental setup:

Partner A lies on their right side with legs slightly apart. Partner B lies on their left side, positioning themselves perpendicular to Partner A. Partner B's right leg slides under Partner A's legs, while their left leg rests over Partner A's waist.

This creates an "X" or scissor shape when viewed from above, bringing vulvas or genital areas into close contact.

The Contact Point

Success depends on aligning bodies so genital contact feels natural, not forced. The pubic mounds and external genital areas press together through rhythmic rocking motions—not aggressive grinding. For detailed anatomical understanding, refer to external genital anatomy to identify your contact zones.

Movement Patterns

Motion comes from:

• Hip rocking back and forth in small, controlled movements
• Pelvic tilting to adjust pressure and angle
• Leg squeezing to increase or decrease contact intensity
• Core engagement for stability during extended sessions

Think gentle waves rather than vigorous thrusting.

Step-by-Step: Getting Into the Scissor Position Comfortably

1. Prepare Your Space

Clear a comfortable area with enough room for both partners to stretch out fully. Add pillows within arm's reach for adjustments. A firm mattress or padded floor mat works better than soft surfaces that create instability.

Set the temperature warmer than usual—lying still generates less body heat than active positions.

2. Start With Communication

Before beginning, discuss:

• Comfort signals: Establish verbal cues like "more pressure" or "shift left"
• Boundaries: Clarify what feels good versus uncomfortable
• Pacing expectations: Agree that finding the right angle takes time

This conversation reduces performance pressure and builds trust.

3. Position Partner A (Base Partner)

Partner A lies on their right side with their head propped on a pillow for neck support. Their bottom leg extends straight, while the top leg bends slightly at the knee, creating space for Partner B.

Adjust so your hips sit comfortably without twisting your spine. Your shoulders should feel relaxed, not hunched forward.

4. Position Partner B (Active Partner)

Partner B approaches from Partner A's front, lying on their left side. Slide your right leg under both of Partner A's legs, threading it between their thighs. Your left leg drapes over Partner A's waist or upper thigh.

Scoot your hips forward until genital areas align. This may require several small adjustments.

5. Fine-Tune the Angle

Make micro-adjustments:

• Too far apart? → Both partners scoot hips closer simultaneously
• Pressure too intense? → Pull back slightly, add lubricant
• Angle feels off? → The upper partner lifts or lowers their draped leg
• Neck strain? → Add pillows under heads or shoulders

Use hands to stabilize by holding each other's thighs or hips.

6. Initiate Movement Slowly

Start with gentle rocking motions from the hips. Partner B typically leads the rhythm initially, while Partner A responds by matching the pace. Experiment with:

• Speed variations: Slow and steady versus quicker pulses
• Pressure changes: Light contact versus firmer pressing
• Circular motions: Small hip circles instead of linear rocking

Check in verbally every 2–3 minutes during the first attempt.

Scissoring Position Variations for Different Bodies & Preferences

Standard scissoring doesn't work identically for everyone. These adaptations address common challenges:

The Elevated Scissor

Best for: Height differences, limited hip flexibility

Place 2–3 firm pillows under the lower partner's hips, creating an incline. This adjusts the angle without requiring extreme leg positioning. The upper partner gains leverage for easier movement.

The Modified Missionary Scissor

Best for: Beginners, those wanting more stability

Start in missionary position, then Partner B shifts their body 45 degrees to the side while keeping hips aligned. One leg remains between Partner A's legs, the other drapes outside. This hybrid offers familiarity with scissoring benefits.

The Reclining Scissor

Best for: Back pain, pregnancy, reduced stamina

Partner A lies nearly flat with minimal side lean, supported by multiple pillows. Partner B does most of the physical work, using their core to rock while Partner A remains mostly still. Explore comfortable positions with supportive products fromJissbon designed for various body types.

The Assisted Scissor

Best for: Mobility challenges, strength differences

Incorporate a sex pillow or wedge under the lower partner's hips. The upper partner can hold onto a headboard or wall for stability, reducing the core strength required. Consider using accessories like cock rings for added stimulation if incorporating toys.

The Seated Scissor

Best for: Those who find lying down uncomfortable

Both partners sit facing each other with legs interlocked, leaning back on hands for support. This variation puts less pressure on hips and allows better eye contact, though it requires more arm strength.

Enhancing Sensation: Lubrication & Accessories

Lubricant Selection

External genital contact benefits significantly from lubrication:

Apply generously to both partners' external genital areas before starting. Reapply every 10–15 minutes as needed. Learn proper lubricant use from sexual health experts.

Adding Vibration

Small external vibrators enhance the experience:

• Bullet vibrators: Place between contact points for shared sensation
• Clitoral stimulators: One partner wears a hands-free device
• Wearable toys: Remote-controlled options let partners adjust intensity mid-session

A remote controlled bullet vibrator works particularly well, allowing adjustments without breaking rhythm or repositioning hands.

Barrier Methods

For safer sex practices:

• Dental dams: Cut a non-lubricated condom lengthwise or use commercial dams
• Plastic wrap: Food-grade cling wrap creates an effective barrier
• Female condoms: Can be cut and used as larger barriers

Apply water-based lubricant on both sides of barriers to improve sensation and reduce friction.

Common Challenges & Practical Solutions

"I Can't Find the Right Angle"

Solution: Use the 3-point adjustment method:

1. Adjust hip proximity (closer or farther)
2. Modify leg placement (higher or lower drape)
3. Change spine alignment (lean forward or back)

Make one adjustment at a time, testing for 30 seconds before changing again. Consider trying sex toys for couples that assist with positioning.

"My Arm Falls Asleep"

Solution: Rotate support points every 5–7 minutes:

• Switch from propping on elbow to lying flat with pillow under head
• Use the free arm to hold your partner's thigh instead
• Place a folded towel under the shoulder bearing weight

"We Keep Slipping Apart"

Solution: Increase friction strategically:

• Place a yoga mat or textured blanket under your bodies
• Both partners engage core muscles to maintain position
• Use hands to grip each other's upper thighs or hips
• Slow down the rhythm—rushed movements create instability

"It Feels Awkward or Not Pleasurable"

Solution: Adjust expectations and exploration:

This position may not work for everyone, and that's completely normal. Bodies vary in how external genital contact creates pleasure. Some people require more direct, focused stimulation than scissoring provides.

Try 3–4 genuine attempts with different variations before deciding it's not for you. Consider it as one option among many rather than a must-try position.

"I Get Tired Quickly"

Solution: Build endurance gradually:

• Start with 3–5 minute sessions, taking breaks
• Alternate who does more active movement
• Strengthen hip flexors and core muscles through regular stretching
• Switch to less demanding variations when fatigue sets in

Safety, Hygiene & Health Considerations

Preventing Injury

Scissoring poses low injury risk when done mindfully:

• Warm up: Light stretching beforehand prevents muscle pulls
• Go slowly: Sudden movements can strain hip flexors or inner thighs
• Communicate pain immediately: Discomfort that increases is a stop signal
• Support weak areas: Use pillows to protect knees, backs, or necks

For detailed guidance on safe sexual practices, consult healthcare resources.

STI Transmission Considerations

Skin-to-skin genital contact can transmit certain infections:

• Herpes (HSV): Can spread through external contact even without visible sores
• HPV: Transmitted via skin contact in the genital region
• Pubic lice: Spreads through close body contact

Barriers like dental dams reduce but don't eliminate risk. Regular STI testing and open communication about status remain essential. Review safer sex guidelines from health authorities.

Hygiene Practices

Maintain cleanliness without over-washing:

• Before: Gentle external washing with warm water (avoid harsh soaps)
• During: Use clean hands if adjusting positions or applying lubricant
• After: Rinse external areas with warm water, pat dry gently

Urinating after sexual activity helps flush bacteria from the urethral opening, reducing UTI risk.

When to Avoid This Position

Skip scissoring if you're experiencing:

• Active genital infections (yeast infections, bacterial vaginosis)
• Recent genital surgery or trauma (allow 6–8 weeks healing)
• Hip, knee, or back injuries causing pain with movement
• Severe flexibility limitations making leg positioning painful

Frequently Asked Questions

Does scissoring actually work for pleasure, or is it just for show?

It absolutely works for many people, though success varies based on anatomy and technique. The position provides consistent clitoral and vulvar stimulation through rhythmic contact—similar to other forms of external rubbing. Media often portrays it unrealistically (too fast, too vigorous), which sets false expectations. 

How long does it take to get the positioning right?

First attempts typically require 5–15 minutes of adjustment before finding a comfortable, pleasurable angle. This is completely normal. By the third or fourth time trying, most couples reduce setup time to 2–3 minutes. Don't expect seamless coordination immediately—even experienced partners need brief adjustments when trying scissoring after breaks. Treat the positioning process as part of foreplay rather than an obstacle.

Can you use scissoring with a strap-on or penetrative toy?

Yes, with modifications. One partner wears a strap-on harness while maintaining the interlocking leg position. The angle works better for shallow penetration rather than deep thrusting. Alternatively, place a dual vibrating cock ring or double-ended toy between partners for shared internal and external stimulation while maintaining the scissoring position.

What if we have significantly different heights or body sizes?

Height differences of 6+ inches require creative solutions. The taller partner typically becomes Partner B (upper/active position), which creates better leverage. Use pillows extensively under the shorter partner's hips and torso to bridge the gap. The elevated scissor variation (mentioned earlier) specifically addresses this challenge. Very large size differences may make standard scissoring impractical—consider the modified missionary scissor hybrid instead.

Is scissoring only for certain types of couples?

Not at all. While historically associated with women who have sex with women, scissoring works for any couple seeking non-penetrative, full-body contact. Partners of all genders can adapt the position by focusing on genital-to-genital contact regardless of anatomy type. The fundamental principle—interlocking legs creating alignment for external stimulation—translates across different body configurations.

How do we incorporate scissoring into foreplay versus making it the main event?

Use scissoring as foreplay by keeping sessions brief (5–10 minutes) with lighter pressure and slower rhythms. This builds arousal without exhaustion. As a main activity, extend sessions to 15–20 minutes with varying intensities, taking short breaks to add lubricant or shift angles. Many couples alternate between scissoring and other positions rather than using it exclusively—treat it as one technique in your rotation, not a standalone act.

Finding What Works for Your Bodies

Scissoring rewards experimentation and honest communication more than most positions. The angle that works perfectly for one couple might feel completely wrong for another—and that's expected given the anatomical variations between bodies.

Focus on the journey of discovery rather than achieving a specific outcome. Some sessions will feel amazing; others might lead you back to familiar positions. Both results provide valuable information about your preferences and compatibility.

Ready to explore intimate options that enhance your experience? Discover tools designed for diverse bodies and preferences through sex toys for women that complement various positions and techniques.